Relating Together
Half Hour Meeting 2
Practicing the
Principles of Prosperity in relationships.
What You Need
Half hour of uninterrupted time once a week Relationship Journal
(blank book) Agreements
This is a time for
giving each other information without discussion, a time to listen
and a time to be heard.
Note: "What you did not
appreciate" is always followed by a solution, i.e., what wish I
would have done different or what I would do different if I have a
change to do it again. If you want to discuss anything as a result
of your meeting let your partner know what you want to talk about
and request a mutually acceptable time separate from your Half-Hour
Meeting.
How It Works
Each week you
alternate the role of the recorder who notes in your relationship
journal the points each of you have made. The recorder's notes are
in list form rather than paragraphs or descriptive sentences. Using
the format below to report to each other your thoughts, ideas,
wants, needs, feelings and joys, leaving each other time to ponder
what has been said. Discussions can come later, separate from your
Half-Hour Meeting. Note: this is a weekly routine
- Start by telling
your partner What you appreciated about yourself during the
previous week. This can be something you appreciated in relation
to yourself or with others
- When you have
finished and your appreciation, your partner reports what they
appreciated about themselves and that is recorded.
- Then, tell each
other what you did not appreciate about yourself. i.e., something
you did or said either in regards to yourself or your partner or
someone or something else. For the purpose of this exercise,
report something you did not appreciate, only if you have a
solution. For example, if you were upset with how you expressed
your anger, your solution would not be that you not be angry, but
how you could have expressed that anger in a way that would have
been easier for you or someone else. Remember, for this
experience, solutions always follow what you did not appreciate.
- Now Tell your
partner about a personal challenge you see for yourself in the
coming week and specifically what they can do to be supportive of
you meeting your personal challenge.
Note: A personal challenge might be eating better, improving work
relationships, playing more, etc. Personal challenges can be
positive. Remember to be specific about how your partner can be
supportive.
- Finally, if
you want to talk about anything of conflict that has been said
make an appointment with your partner at a time separate from your
Half-Hour Meeting. Be sure this is uninterrupted time.
- After you have
finished, agree on the date and time for your next weekly
Half-Hour Meeting.
Caution:
This exercise may evoke past or present feelings or issues you have
been successful at avoiding. If you find yourself avoiding your
Half-Hour Meetings or unresolved conflict increases, you may want to
consider professional help with your relationship.
How to put feelings
and boundaries together in a way that meet both of your needs and
desires is an important ingredient in relationships. Negotiating and
conflict is here to stay. You might as well find a way to have it
work for you. Conflict with resolution is what long term
relationships have in common
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